(1) Let's start with the people. They are all known by one five-letter name. Who are they?

MUSICIAN, HER SURNAME IS GUDMUNDSDOTTIR (again fucking spelled wrong because of the font not displaying the proper characters don't @ me for being ignorant i'm trying ;_; THANKS xxx dan)

BJORK

CLASSICAL POET MORE INTELLIGENT THAN HIS NAMESAKE IN SPRINGFIELD

HOMER

BELGIAN CREATOR OF CAPTAIN HADDOCK AND PROFESSOR CALCULUS

HERGE

HE HAD THE WEIGHT OF THE WORLD ON HIS SHOULDERS, IN ANCIENT TIMES

ATAS

THE POLICE MAN WHO WENT SOLO

STING

THE LION KING (EVENTUALLY)

SIMBA

THE LION KING (IN NARNIA)

ASLAN

IN 2006 IT WAS HIS 'TIME' ON THE X FACTOR

CHICO

TROJAN WOMAN APPARENTLY SO BEAUTIFUL HER FACE LAUNCHED 1,000 SHIPS

HELEN

HER NEXT ALBUM HAS BEEN DELAYED AND WILL PRESUMABLY NOW BE TITLED 31

ADELE

(2) It's snacktime! There are five of them, and they each have five letters. Four are chocolate and one is a bag of crisps!

LIKE FLAKES IN JACKETS

TWIRL

POSSIBLY DON'T CONTAIN REAL PRAWNS

SKIPS

CHOCOLATE, NOUGAT, HAZELNUT. THE WORST CHOCOLATE BAR OF ALL (IF WE ACCEPT THAT A TWIX ISN'T A CHOCOLATE BAR, BUT A CHOCOLATE BISCUIT) (also this is not my opinion, i don't accept this slander from richard wtf)

TOPIC

SSSSSSSHHHHHH!

WISPA

GIVE THIS LAST CLUE TO SOMEONE YOU LOVE

ROLOS

(4) This time, my ramble is taking me to ten places, each with a one-word name of five letters. Join me!

STARTING LOCATION IN DEATH ON THE NILE

CAIRO

RIVIERE YOU CAN REGARDEZ FROM NOTRE-DAME

SEINE

SCOTTISH CITY THAT GAVE ITS NAME TO THE CAPITAL OF WESTERN AUSTRALIA

PERTH

YORKSHIRE CITY THAT GAVE US THE BROWNLEE BROTHERS, NICOLA ADAMS AND THE KAISER CHIEFS

LEEDS

IT SPLIT INTO TWO AFRICAN COUNTRIES WITH SIMILAR NAMES IN 2011

SUDAN

US STATE THAT STARTS WITH ONE VOWEL AND ENDS WITH ANOTHER

IDAHO

RIVER THAT RUNS FROM THE TROSSACHS TO AN ESTUARY WITH EDINBURGH ON IT

FIRTH

PLANET WITH NO MOONS

VENUS

CANADIAN TERRITORY THAT BORDERS BRITISH COLUMBIA AND ALASKA

YUKON

FICTIONAL CITY SETTING FOR CASUALTY AND OTHER BBC SHOWS

HOLBY

(5) Right. In honour of the Rings, I'm going to give you the names of ten characters. I want you to tell me, for a point each time, whether they are someone devised by J. R. R. Tolkien, or someone devised by me, just now. That's right: it's Hobbit or Nobbit.

HARDCASTLE MEADBREWER

NOBBIT!

ORGULAS BRANDYBUCK

HOBBIT!

PRIMROSE GARDNER

HOBBIT!

BOZO BRIGGSWAITHE

NOBBIT!

BROTHER TWONOSE

NOBBIT!

BRIFFO BOFFIN

HOBBIT!

JACK IN THE BOX

NOBBIT!

THE MAN IN THE MOON

HOBBIT!

CORA GOODBODY

HOBBIT!

POMELA, LADY HERLOCK

NOBBIT!

(6) Finally, which spy movies with 'GOLD' in the title am I describing?

OUR HERO THWARTS THE BADDIE'S PLAN TO CONTAMINATE FORT KNOX AND ESCAPES WITH PUSSY GALORE

GOLDFINGER

OUR HERO THWARTS THE BADDIE, WHO IS ARMED WITH A VERY EXPENSIVE FIREARM, AND CELEBRATES WITH MARY GOODNIGHT

THE MAN WITH THE GOLDEN GUN

OUR HERO, NOW PLAYED BY PIERCE BROSNAN, THWARTS A PLAN INVOLVING A SATELLITE WEAPON - AND M IS NOW A WOMAN

GOLDENEYE

OUR HERO THWARTS THE BADDIE'S PLAN TO TRAVEL BACK IN TIME, WITH THE HELP OF BEYONCE

GOLDMEMBER